(8 of Cups, Black Cat Tarot by Maria Kuara)
“How do I write this?”
The question above is what I keep asking myself as I try to write this post without hurting anyone’s feelings.
I remind myself that I am writing this in order to help others who feel the same way.
To remind myself and others that change is natural and can be navigated in as graceful a way as possible – even if you are simply showing grace to yourself.
In the last few years I have experienced many changes in myself, and as a result in who I resonate with, and who resonates with me.
One of my lingering fears about stepping into my spiritual power is that I will lose people that I have loved for many years.
I used to worry that they would leave me if they could not understand or believe in the things I now do.
Slowly but surely that worry has transformed into understanding that even if they support me wholeheartedly, it may end up being me that has to leave.
OK Ok! I will stop being so dramatic.
When I say the word ‘leave’ I don’t necessarily mean that physically, in fact in most cases this ‘leaving’ is done without any kind of outward manifestation.
I am very much still here, but a large part of me is gone.
As is perfectly symbolized by the above card, my soul has started the journey home.
(By home I mean the place where we have come from, where spirit resides, and ultimately back to myself.)
Along this path, I have started to meet the people that are meant to accompany me, teach me, give me hints about the path forward.
The tricky part though is that in walking forward I have to leave things behind.
Sometimes this process seems never ending, especially when I think of all the things I have already let go of or lost.
*
In this way, my social landscape is changing.
I spend a lot of time alone and in nature.
I spend a lot of time meditating, praying and writing.
I spend a lot of time in psychic/mediumship development.
When I choose to spend time with others, it is because they contribute to my life by bringing me joy, as I hope I bring them joy.
I am a recovering over-giver, something I have talked about on this blog many times.
I would go so far as to say I am a recovering codependent.
One of my life lessons is learning how to maintain balanced relationships.
Relationships that are not made up of abandonment and control.
Relationships that start with a foundation of self-love.
This means I will no longer be around people who hurt me, who take me for granted or have a hard time respecting me.
I will no longer be around those that seek to take from me, without a mutual basis of trust and generosity.
Basically this means that I am no longer putting up with crap 🙂
How liberating!
But also how confronting…
Confronting for those that find themselves like one of those eight cups above –
behind me.
“Why am I writing this?”
I am writing this so that those of you who feel guilty for moving away from those that don’t truly care about you, will start to leave the guilt behind.
I am also writing this for myself, so that I don’t feel guilty for leaving certain people in the past.
Good things can only truly enter our lives when we allow space for them.
Why hold on to those that actively treat us bad, when we could let in those who will love us?
Much love always Txx
The beautiful thing is that you really are own responsible for your own feelings, not others’. When I realized that I cannot (as my mother erroneously taught me) actually hurt others feelings, since it is their thoughts that cause their feelings, it was tremendously liberating. People are going to think and feel the way they want, regardless of what we do. That said, I am also a recovering over-giver myself. There is nothing more sweet than setting the appropriate boundaries and taking care of yourself. Rock on, sister. Just imagine the energy you will have to do great things in the world.
Thank you for your beautiful comment! I really appreciate it 🙂 Yep, I am beginning to understand just how precious energy is. Thank you for reading xx