Leaning Into Boredom

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The last time I felt bored was during retreat at New Year.

This was perhaps the first time I had felt boredom in a number of years, maybe since childhood.

I recognised what a luxury it was to be feeling that way.

Usually when I am on retreat I have so much going on in my head that though I may feel peace at times, boredom is a long way off.

At New Year, I felt a blessed level of boredom descend on me, right on New Year’s Day.

I remember heading to the library, a room downstairs in the house, and sitting around the coffee table – in silence- with other retreatants.

I saw the colouring books that had been on the table for the past few days and almost giddy excitement found me.

I grinned and grabbed a book, my mouth hanging open in joy as I began to colour.

This memory is so vivid and finds me now as I find myself bored once again.

There is no real reason to be bored anymore, we have our phones, our computers and even with social distance it is not hard to reach out to someone for a chat or find a show to watch.

But I resist the urge.

I let myself go slower.

I delight in a shower.

I watch a replay of the book club I am part of.

I write this post.

I listen to the birds at dusk and watch the light move across my bedroom wall.

I am choosing to be bored at this time, because it is with boredom that great shifts arrive.

When our mind is not actively engaged in ‘doing’ we get to feeling, and new insights and understanding is our reward.

 

Much love Txx

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